“Every positive thought we pass between us makes room for more light” John Lewis, RIP
I experienced a wonderful conflict this week. The last story I wrote was very well received and I admit to preferring more people reading my pieces than less. It was a personal one about my relationship to camping, meandering through my past to share the story. I figured I should continue the roll with another one from the archives of my fading memory.
I decided I was going to write about my incredibly varied work history, which began as a waiter in the sixth grade at the neighborhood delicatessen. I worked lunches, serving my friends hot dogs and fries and was rewarded the incredible sum of fifty cents a day! I remember the virgin feeling of independence and feeling really good about myself. My mother was widowed at an early time for the three of us, including my older brother. Taking care of myself, at least in my mind, seemed like the right thing to do under the circumstances. Absolutely nothing has changed since that long ago time.
At the same time I was thinking about laying out my unbelievable employment history for all of you, I had this other thought about how incredibly hopeless the future is for us and the generations to come. It felt completely synchronous with recounting my job history, me telling a story to a few people at this moment, a terribly small perspective, in light of what is going on all around us.
Then, from a place I know not where, I thought about being the Buddha and writing a story to millions and millions of people, from the past, this moment and forever from now. I instantly jettisoned my small stories, at least temporarily pushing them aside, dwarfed by a much larger idea. It hit me hard and it felt like I had to speak a language so different from one that recounted job history or bitched about how screwed we all are. I thought to myself, what kind of message did I want to share that would live far beyond my small life?
We are all part of an enormous family that was birthed with the beginning of life, millions of years ago. It will continue to grow to a time beyond our ability to comprehend. Its members consist of all living beings, not simply humans that look like us, but all life, as loosely defined as our imagination can allow. Unless you’ve thought about this stuff, it is really tough to comprehend. Then, I thought if you can’t embrace this totality of all life, where do you go? Well, you could say that you live your life, passing through this time and that’s it, a sad prospect. If you even allow for the possibility of heaven and hell, or even coming back for another pass, there are no lines to be drawn and absolutely everything is possible.
This idea of some kind of universal interconnection took some getting used to for me, but I confess to being drawn to it. Along with this idea, is the one that the past, present and future are this culinary cornucopia of flavors and textures that run together into this incredible soup of wherever and whenever you happen to find yourself. Again, if you give up fighting, you accept this idea that we are all in a world of perpetual change, with no handles to grasp. I know it would give Einstein a headache and I would bet money he thought about these things.
Humans, that’s us, have this thing about suffering. The wealthy want to be wealthier, the short want to be taller, the poor want to be richer and none of us are thrilled about the prospect of dying, no matter who we are. This was a huge deal for the Buddha. He believed and taught that understanding and accepting the causes of suffering would not make it disappear, but it would contribute to instilling a sense of grace within us. Left unchecked, suffering is a gateway to anger, because laying blame on others keeps the truth away from ourselves. The blame game has been going on for millennia and we may have entered the World Series of Blame today. So many of us want to blame everyone else, other than ourselves, for this suffering.
In a state of semi-consciousness around 4:30AM this morning, I envisioned this huge banquet table, infinitely long. On one end, were these ancient tribal leaders, Lords and Ladies of long ago, sitting next to the CEO’s and the rest of financial royalty. They were eating the most opulent meal imaginable, served on exquisite porcelain, their every need being met by a hyper attentive wait staff. Somewhere, down on the farthest end, nearly out of sight, were these little children, sitting on dirt, dressed in rags, eating week old bread and drinking dirty water. All of them are in the same room, blind to each other. Do you understand how wrong this is?
All of us, everyone of us, are in this together. You and I are connected to everyone who has come before and everyone who will come after. All living creatures, making sure the trees and butterflies are included, have this unbreakable bond with each other. God lives within all of us and we all sit at that table of life. If we truly understand the remarkable nature of our existence, then we know for certain we can make a difference. Simple acts of kindness are all we need.
The moment is now and I don’t want to ever find myself without hope or the words.
Imagine John Lennon’s Imagine